by: MaryEllen Herrera
Deepest of Agony
Thoughts, memories – pain they cause
Questions, longing – cannot change
Scenes, discussions – recreations of the past
Yearning, longing – knowing it cannot be!
Truth torments, logic reprimands, heart fails you.
Trust scarred, questions remain, self inflicted suffering!.
No answer obtained, no truth told – hidden inside
Searching, investigating – seeking an answer
close but not entering, so near but not approaching – paralyzed
Waiting, wondering – fear of what might be discovered!
No escape, no deliverance, except what I give myself.
No repentance, no acceptance, I hold all my pain.
Deepest of all is the knowledge – if found what it could bring.
Am I ready to face my sin, my demons, my pain?
Time continues, time endures, time will tell what I cannot,
No secret is kept, lies are uncovered, I will face what I have avoided…
Willing, unwilling, ready or not.